“While I kept silence, my body wasted away, through my groaning all day long.” (Psalm 32:3 NRSV)
The man had definitely wronged me. While I nursed my grudge with thoughts of retaliation and maybe even a lawsuit, I was well over one hundred percent certain I was right. He had wronged me and I would tip the scales in my favor by striking back at him and what he stood for. There was a certain kind of energy I felt from the anger and the wild speculation of revenge possibilities. Meanwhile my life was spinning out of control.
I had quit my job over the wrong and moved to California. I had suffered a cataclysmic drop in income. Here I was using my four years of college to deliver calculators. Finally, after a worship service I was invited to let go of my unforgiveness. Just let it go…and don’t ever take it back. I did it. Inside I felt like my soul had been launched toward heaven. During the night I could barely sleep due to the happy fireworks going off in my heart.
Since that time I have learned that forgiveness may be the only way forward in impossibly broken relationships. And the beauty of this tool is I don’t need the other person’s permission to use it.