Experience as a Flashlight:  The woman was beside herself with grief.  It was only a few months since her husband had died.  She was not looking forward to Christmas.  How could she deal with that loss at Christmas when the whole family would gather together and his absence would loom over everything?

I saw her regularly at the gym so, from time to time, I asked her if she had yet come up with a plan.  Finally she told me she had.  She was going to put all the mementos of his life (eg pictures, love letters, souvenirs from trips) together in an album which she would show the kids at Christmas.  It would bring back memories which would help fill his physical absence.

I saw her after Christmas and she seemed at peace.  Things had gone well she said.     And preparing the album had given her focus…