Experience as a Flashlight 

“I’m Only Sleeping”  (Beatles)

When I wake up early in the morning
Lift my head, I’m still yawning
When I’m in the middle of a dream
Stay in bed, float up stream (float up stream)

Please, don’t wake me, no, don’t shake me
Leave me where I am – I’m only sleeping

The clock’s numbers seemed frozen in time.  My staring didn’t  help.  I couldn’t get back to sleep and I didn’t know what to do with myself.   I thought about the next day and how hard it would be to make it through.  I would probably have a dull headache.  My brain wouldn’t function at full capacity.  I would go through the day in a daze.

During other sleepless nights I have tried to outsmart the sleeplessness.  I tell myself “as long as I can’t get to sleep, I might as well do some work.”  While thinking about what I could be doing, I usually fall back to sleep.  Other times I have thought about all the people who need my prayers and after starting down my list, the next thing I know it is morning.

Sometimes I have tried wearing myself out doing push-ups until I dropped.  This seemed to release any anxiety and tension and I usually fell back to sleep rather quickly.

The experts at a local sleep clinic had me for one night and told me I had a slight case of sleep apnea and a CPAP (continuous positive airway pressure) device would probably help.  I endured long lectures on how to use the device, but in the end I had to return it because I kept tearing it off during the night, not to mention scaring myself when I got up to use the bathroom and looked in the mirror.

Nowadays I use a little strip that opens up air passage into my nostrils.  This plus a cold glass of water and a couple of Tylenol tablets help me most days.  If that doesn’t work, I know the last thing that will work is staring at the clock.  That just adds to the frustration.  There are things I can do to help myself in this as well as many other difficulties in life.   If all else fails, I can pray.  That seems to tamp down exasperation faster than anything.