The Promise of the Rainbow

Posted on February 6, 2013 by richrockwood

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Living in the Past:  Back in the late 1970’s I was returning to Michigan from California.  I had lived out there for almost two years and was now heading home.  I was driving through New Mexico when it started to rain…hard.   As I drove into Truth or Consequences, New Mexico I saw the after-effects of the deluge, water filled streets, cars looking like boats as they powered along, my car suddenly part of a flotilla.  I was afraid.

I had all my earthly possessions in that car, clothes and record player, paperwork and money order, things with which I would start my life over again in Michigan.   As I moved cautiously through the water, I wondered if this was where my trip would end…it did not.

I made it through to higher ground.  As I headed north the black sky was suddenly filled with color.  Sunlight breaking through clouds and entering the last drops of rain at just the right angle was being refracted (bent) causing me to see a red, yellow and blue half-circle in the nothing sky.   This is the scientific explanation, but at that moment the rainbow took on a greater significance.

I remembered the rainbow’s meaning.  It was God’s sign to Noah he would never flood the earth again.   I breathed a sigh of relief all the way back to Michigan.

I love seeing rainbows for more than their colors.  They mean I have looked up for my strength and have seen His promise once more breaking through the rain in glorious color. What does a rainbow mean to you?  Just a refraction of light or something more?  I would love to hear your what you think?

Posted in Adventures, Appearance, Faith, Fear, Heaven, Nature, Perseverance, Perspective, Providence, Religion, Stress, Suffering, The Past, Trust, Visual, Weather, Worry | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The First Time

Posted on February 4, 2013 by richrockwood

FirstGeneral Observations About Life:  The first job I had was packing groceries and helping people load them in their cars.  I worked at a local supermarket and providing this service to customers was something done which young people could do.  To prepare me for the job, a trainer showed me how to pack a bag putting heavy cans on the bottom and filling my way to the top with lighter items.  I happily went at my first order, finished it and carried the groceries out to their car.  After I finished, I made my way back into the store, ready to go home.  Then it hit me.  I have four more hours of this.

The first order was a challenge, but I felt good doing it.  Coming back in after completing one order, my mind went into hyper-drive:  How would I feel repeating the same motions hour after hour?  Would it become tedious?  Would I become bored?  Could I make it?

It seemed like an important event, because this was my first exposure to life’s repetitions.  I was to learn that there would be many first times in my life, but they would quickly be followed by repetitions.  And getting comfortable with repetitious activities, even work, would make life easier.  It would also make it move faster.

I can still remember my first date with a girl nicknamed “Tootie.”  I had thought making the call had been tense, but actually going out was like sitting down into a pressure cooker.  I spent hours washing and vacuuming the car, then carefully shaving, showering and applying powerful after-shave.  I stood in front of her door feeling nervous and inadequate.  The date went well and there have been numerous dates since then, but the first time with each person was always the most difficult.

My first day in the Army was long and difficult.  I had to report early, fill out reams of paperwork and board a train for Fort Knox, Kentucky.  The second day was a lot easier and I gradually grew to enjoy my time in service.

Next week I will board a cruise ship for the first time, as will my wife.  I have read about it and watched videos.  I still have a bit of nervousness because there is so much unknown as there is with any first time activity.

First time experiences are a wonderful thing.  They open us up to a wider knowledge of life.  Fortunately, not all of life is a first time experience.  Once we’ve done it the first time, the second time gets easier as we adapt to it.  Most of life is repetition.  We made it through previous first time events and we’ll make it through all the others that are waiting out ahead of where we are today.  God has gifted each of us with a desire and an ability to grow and adapt to new things.

Posted in Acceptance, Accomplishment, Adaptability, Adventures, Claustrophobia, Courage, Employment, Job, Military, Perspective, Reality, Stress, Wisdom, Work, Youth | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Music Can Enhance a Mood

Posted on February 1, 2013 by richrockwood

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Experience as a Flashlight: I have found music to be a great partner as I go through life.  It motivates me to work.  It helps me concentrate.  It leads me to higher levels of thought.

Back in my college days, I noticed if I had tedious, repetitious work to do, rock and roll helped me roll into the work and then once started helped me maintain a rhythm until I was finished.   Even when I was exercising music helped motivate me.  I used to get psyched up for my 6 mile jogs listening to “The Eye of The Tiger.”  The explosive drumming made me hungry for the exertion and runner’s high I would soon be feeling.

If I had work which required concentration New Age Music with it’s slow moving full melody tones helped slow my mind down and set it into an easy mode while I put my thoughts together in the right order.  I often found that even classical music doesn’t work then because it takes my attention to it from the work.

I did, however, find that at times I needed absolute silence because the work at hand required so much focus that any sounds at all were a distraction.  In those cases, I needed to click the stereo off.

Then there were those times when I would listen to a piece by Bach, Beethoven, Mozart or some other gifted composer and sense I was suddenly in another space….perhaps Heaven.  They remind me of a line in Peter Shaffer’s play “Amadeus”  when Salieri first hears Mozart’s music.  As the Adagio from the Serenade for thirteen wind instruments (K. 361) drifts into the room, Salieri is so startled by its simple intensity and exquisite charm he finally admits “It seemed to me that I had heard a voice of God…”

I have found through the years that the right music enhances any experience, can lift the spirit and even break through to the Divine Chambers.

Posted in Appreciation, Belief, Enjoyment, Eternity, Famous People, Happiness, Healing, Heaven, Mozart, Music, Passion, Perspective, Pleasure, Relaxation, Stress, Study, Tasks, Work | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Meet the Beatles!

Posted on January 30, 2013 by richrockwood

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Living in the Past: I remember when I first heard the Beatles.  I was driving with my college buddy out to school and their song “I Wanna Hold Your Hand” came on the radio.   He told me “they are the hottest new band from England” and so I was curious.  In my haste to “get with it” I mistakenly thought they spelled their name as “Beetles” like little bugs.  And my first impression of the song was they sounded a little bit like bugs singing.  Whoa!

A short time later, I learned they were coming to New York to appear on Ed Sullivan.  So along with millions of other young Americans I cleared my Sunday evening of all other activities and waited impatiently for introductions to give way to them.  Finally, the camera moved over and there they were in glorious black and white singing “All My Lovin,” Paul singing lead vocal, John and George adding harmonies.   Although their hair was longer than any I’d seen, the boys were clean cut and quite good looking.   The four boys created a scream fest for the young mostly female audience.  A part of me wanted to scream as well.  They were good.

I remember studying the cover of their album “Introducing the Beatles.”    The sound was definitely different, tender love songs expressing “Till There Was You” offset with boisterous, almost yelling songs like “She Loves You-Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!”

For a time they were the spokesmen for a young energetic generation ready to enter a new promised land.  They had a quick wit and musical imaginations that set aside all previous bounds for rock and roll.  Every song had a different sound and the challenge was to understand the lyrics because, after all, they were singing about what we felt

Having the Beatles in my life as I moved into college life was the perfect confluence of new sounds meeting expanded boundaries.  I had escaped the limits of high school and was now gliding along on the “magical mystery tour” Beatles Bus.

I am pleased the Beatles came to prominence when I was young.  What is great about their music is that the youth of every generation can find something they like in it.  I would like to salute their musical contributions and influence with the following tribute: 

Posted in Appearance, Appreciation, Art, Beatles, Creativity, Enjoyment, Famous People, Feelings, Music, Passion, Paul and Ringo, Perspective, The Past | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

I’m Still Me

Posted on January 28, 2013 by richrockwood

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Observations About Life: It still requires a few blinks to get used to the elderly man I see in the mirror.  There are only whispers of hair where massive amounts once lived, changed at intervals from left to right or brushed straight back.  Dull gray has spread through the beard like lava oozing from a dormant volcano.  Dark circles ring the eyes, still full of curiosity and sensitivity.

Pain camps permanently in shoulder muscles pinched tight by side sleeping every night, the only position that works.  Sinuses throb until they have my full attention, breaking my concentration, pulling me out of my writing, sending me to the medicine cabinet or back to the pharmacy.  What is happening to me?

I am getting older, or I should say, my body is getting older.  This is strange because on the inside I feel like the same person.  Inside, I believe I can still throw a baseball hard enough to burn someone’s hand, with a whirlybird windup, rocket fast delivery, landing with such force that pain and heat pass through several inches of protective foam.  Inside, I can run like the football player on the field below me.  In my mind, I still have Tom Selleck looks, bushy eyebrows, brown penetrating eyes, washboard stomach, bulging biceps, and wavy brown hair on top with a mustache slightly upturned at each end.

Inside I am still hungry to learn, passionate about things like flying, music, photography, travel, and new adventures.  Inside I’m still me.

So when you look at me, don’t just see a man who is getting older; rather see a young man hiding inside the body of a retiree whose a lot younger than he looks.

Even though I look older, it’s still me on the inside.  My body has aged, but my mind is still learning, still alive with curiosity about life.  My body has slowed down, and I get tired.  My capacity to love, however, has not diminished.  I still have the passion for my wife and for life.

Posted in Aging, Appearance, Contentment, Enjoyment, Life, Manliness, Old Age, Passion, Personality, Perspective, Retirement, Self-Worth, Thankfulness, The Past, Time, Wisdom, Worry, Youth | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Everything Seemed Smaller Now

Posted on January 25, 2013 by richrockwood

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Experience as a Flashlight:  A number of years ago, I had the opportunity to travel back with my brothers to our boyhood town.  It’s a small town in a largely agricultural area of Wisconsin.  Our dad had moved us there from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan  because of a job opportunity.  We had no other family or friends there and so growing up we all had to make new friends.

It was not easy fitting into a new community because it seems no matter how long you live there, you will always be an outsider.  In general I have good memories of the town, but life was still hard at times.  We had to walk to school which seemed like a long distance.  We had to listen to teachers and other adults who towered over us.  We had to pay attention and study so we could receive good grades.

I now am seeing how many of those experiences influenced me, molding me into the person I am today.  One of the things I have observed in my behavior is that I seem to be fighting battles with others that began in elementary school.  Our family did not have extra income.  Mom and dad were careful with the money so it would cover all the expenses.  One of the areas they had to cut back in was clothes.  We were not able to wear clothes that were considered popular at the time (eg button down shirts).  As a result I thought I was not as good as the kids who were wearing them.

When my brothers and I went back, we all had the same reaction.  What appeared so large back then seemed smaller now.  The distance from our house to school was only about six blocks.  Houses seemed smaller.  The church seemed smaller.  Even my memories were smaller.

I met with some of my best buddies thinking it would be just as it used to be.  It wasn’t.  They were different and we had almost nothing to talk about.  It seemed that too much time had passed and we had nothing in common.  Later I would attend a High School Reunion and again feel no connection with them, so I have given up going back.

I have come to realize that while those early years seemed to take on such an important role in my development, in reality their importance to me has shrunk over time.  Everything about back there and then is smaller.  And probably that is how it should be.

Posted in Acceptance, Aging, Appearance, Contentment, Feelings, Identity, Letting Go, Memory, Old Age, Perseverance, Perspective, Reality, Self-Worth, Thankfulness, Time, Wisdom | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

My First Camera

Posted on January 23, 2013 by richrockwood

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Living in the Past:  My first serious camera was a 35 millimeter Argus C3.  I cannot recall how I got it, but I think it was a hand me down from someone.  It had a cold and calculating appearance, with a number of dials and dark skin accentuated around the edges with shiny metal.  Those dials controlled the aperture and shutter settings which I didn’t understand.

I fiddled with the dials but couldn’t figure them out.  Then I read an articles which gave me some idea about the power I now had to create interesting photos.  The aperture setting controlled the lens opening and determined how much of the subject area was in focus.  The shutter setting controlled how fast the lens opened and closed which determined whether an action shot was blurred or not.   With these two settings I could create photos that were interesting and artistic.

This camera sent me shuttering along the photography road.  I carefully clicked open my shutter at what I thought were the best possible moments.  I learned the way to avoid shadowy, gloomy outdoor portraits and scenes was to take my exposures only in the early morning or late afternoon hours.   Along the way, I discovered I had an eye for portraiture that won praise from people, like my friend, so happy by the picture of him in his cowboy hat which he couldn’t wait to give to his mother.  No one else ever gave him this freedom of expression.  I shot pictures of water falls at slow shutter speeds which turned the water into soft wisps of white.  I could never draw, but the camera finally gave me the means to let out my imprisoned urge to create visual images.

I waited a long time to get into digital photography because I feared it took too long to master.  So I wasted money paying for disappointing photos.  I thought the possibility of viewing the final product right away seemed a dream come true… if only I could take the step.

Finally I did and my world of photographic possibilities became bigger…and greater.  Now I could upload digital photos to a computer and edit them using the latest software.  I could enhance the exposure.  I could crop out unwanted objects or people.  I could add special effects.  I remember my first purchase of photo software, however, as a nightmare.  The software provided too many possibilities and confirmed my worst fears of digital photography.

Eventually, I upgraded to my current computer which has set my artistic urge free again.  With a swiftness I never imagined back in the C3 days, I can capture an important event, edit the pictures and place them online in a fraction of the time it used to take to get my roll of film developed and printed.  Here’s a photo taking recently on an outing to Lake Michigan.

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Posted in Accomplishment, Art, Cameras, Creativity, Focus, Happiness, Perspective, Photography, Relaxation, Visual | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Life’s Distractions

Posted on January 21, 2013 by richrockwood

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General Observation On Life:  There are many things along the Road of Life that distract us: a pretty (handsome) face, a deep discount on something we want, a newspaper headline.  Some distractions have a pull so powerful they are termed addictions.  Something like alcohol or drugs can get us to exit off the Main Highway and sit in a ditch somewhere.  Distractions this powerful keep us from the beautiful sights we were meant to see and enjoy along Life’s Highway.

Too much focus on life, however, can become stressful which is why we all are encouraged to find interesting distractions.  Some people take up exercise.  Others take up a hobby like stamp or coin collecting.  Many people enjoy concerts and other forms of entertainment.  Still others enjoy old fashioned puzzles and games.  My personal favorite is photography which I will write about next time.

These distractions can play an important role in our lives.  They can provide a break from the pressures and seriousness of our lives.  I have actually used photography to counter pressures I feel in social situations.

I am coming to appreciate the value of healthy distractions like games, entertainment, and hobbies as necessary rest stops as I keep along Life’s Road being careful to keep my eyes on where I am going so as not to end up in a ditch somewhere for God knows how long.

Posted in Balance, Bondage, Coin Collecting, Enjoyment, Exercise, Focus, Fun, Games, Knitting, Laughter, Life, Peace, Photography, Pleasure, Priorities, Reality, Relaxation, Stamp collecting, Stress, Wisdom | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Am I Enough?

Posted on January 18, 2013 by richrockwood

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Experience as a Flashlight:  “Am I enough?” I wondered as I wandered through my teens and early twenties.  “Do I have enough looks and wittiness to attract a woman to my side?”  “Will I spend all my life alone?”  These thoughts rolled around in my mind and peppered my heart during those early years.

My first marriage ended in DIVORCE.  I had always said if my marriage failed it would be my fault.  I didn’t realize I would be trying to stand tall in a typhoon of trouble.  We were from opposite backgrounds and cultures.  Her looks turned me on and to her I was a path to a better life.  We argued and fought like Siamese Beta Fighters.  In between rounds, she went silent and refused to participate in life.

My second marriage was better, but she died suddenly and once again those same thoughts exploded like mines as time dragged on.  I tried Christian computer dating but gave up because it always led to wasted time and money.

One day I visited my old church and a door opened to an old friendship that became a relationship.  We each had suffered loss.  We each thought we were ready to TRY once more to let someone in.  Seven months later we vowed commitments to each other in the presence of friends and family.

Questions of doubt are more widespread in the population than I imagined as a teenager.  Sometimes life has pleasant surprises waiting if we have the patience to wait.

Posted in Contentment, Feelings, Friends, Healing, Patience, Perseverance, Providence, relationships | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Sideburns?

Posted on January 16, 2013 by richrockwood

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Living in the Past:  Back in the 1970’s sideburns were the rage for men.  This may have been a development from the mop head look introduced by the Beatles back in the 1960’s

According to Wikipeda:  Sideburns or sideboards[1] are patches of facial hair grown on the sides of the face, extending from the hairline to below the ears and worn with an unbearded chin. The term sideburns is a 19th-century corruption of the original burnsides, named after American Civil War general Ambrose Burnside,[2] a man known for his unusual facial hairstyle that connected thick sideburns by way of a moustache, but left the chin clean-shaven. “Burnsides” became “sideburns” because of their location on the face and for the somewhat incompetent Burnside’s tendency to “get things the wrong way ’round”.

It was a kind of facial adventure to let the sideburns normally only a fraction of an inch below the top of the ear creep further and further south towards the chin.  What was neat about the experience is a man didn’t really have to start his sideburns by letting the entire area go unshaven.  He could let the regular sideburn get longer little by little so the increase was barely noticed until the whole thing had filled in.  They were just there.

It was so much fun having sideburns that I failed to notice when men got rid of them.  And there I was still looking very much like Elvis (or so I thought) and everyone else looking like they had in the boring days of old.

Posted in Appearance, Art, Fashion, Hair, Identity, Manliness, Neatness, Soldier, Youth | Tagged , , , , , , , | 3 Comments